"And together, we roamed as one, her love undying, faithful to the end"
I was never really serious about anything to be frank except work. The female specie has baffled me, and i suspect they are as baffled as the male specie, but that's another story.
I have never been in a relationship, except with my brother and sister and my folks....and that's kind of mandatory if u come to think of it.
Not that it has affected me. Really. Was cycling with my newfound maniac mates from the NTU Cycling team a couple of nights ago and at the pitstop near Sembawang the topic shifted from hardcore training for possible races to girlfriends. And boy were the chaps surprised at my evergreen status. I wonder why. Is it not normal to not have a gf at twenty one?
Its not that i have not tried. I have. And things have not worked out, so i keep moving. I'm not hurt by the past, not ruffled by the , "Lets just be friends" sentence i have received thrice. I might come across as cold and a chap totally devoid of love and a sense of romance, but really, i am not affected. All i do is bury myself in work and my passions and i feel normal again.
Perhaps i'm too happy-go-lucky. Perhaps those i fell for thought i was never serious, and just a pal, a close friend whose there in times of need, one to rely on, a "nice guy" they say, yet one deemed more of a "brother" which roughly translates to "undatable".
Yes, nice guys do finish last. Its because they can't take risks. They don't want to. All they ever do is be the one who's there, one who offers a shoulder to cry on, a helping hand in times of need, and at the same time, "preserve the friendship" cause of course, its complicated when the one they like just happens to be a close friend.
The thing is, they know they're playing the game incorrectly. They know they have to make the move. And yes, they know that they will eventually lose out if all they do is pretend to be the platonic friend and never make the move until its too late.
But the thing is, they can't be blamed. They are wired differently. The priority for them is that noone gets hurt and things do not get awkward. The risk factor in their decision is almost nil. They always play safe. Don't get me wrong, a person who's wired this way will never hurt the one he loves and yes, they make good bf material.
But on first impressions, on the X-Factor, they come up short with a big fat zero. They lack it, and unless the girl happens to notice, or is one familiar with this topic, she picks up on it, otherwise, they get overlooked and swept aside for the tall ribbed chap with a great smile and sense of excitement.
LOL...
No, I am not sitting her emoing. I am about to start working on my CA questions due next week. This is a break. The above applies to me , yet not. I do admit, i take effort and yet play safe, but i don't pine, and i certainly move on. But for the duration i see a chance, i take effort, and hope the other party is responsive. If otherwise, i don't waste my time in an exercise in futility.
Its cold, and its unromantic. But i can't afford to mope when there is work to be done. Perhaps i have got my ideas wrong about this whole business. Perhaps not.
One thing i know is, that tutorial's not going to solve itself.
Cheers from the,
Matrix
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